Sunday, August 12, 2012

An Idea of the Arts of Beautifying, Perfuming, Alchymy and Chiromancie

How can one resist a sales pitch like this?


By our directions you may attain such a rosid colour, and such a lively cheerfulness, as shall not only make you look like natures workmanship, but also put admiration into the beholders, and fix them in a belief, that you are the first-fruits of the resurrection. Thus we teach you lippid mortalls to retrace the steps of youthfulness, and to transform the wrinkled hide of Hecuba into the tender skin of the greatest of beauties, which then you will dull by the advance of your Features, and make all conceited shadows of glory, to vanish in your presence. When once your artificial heat shall appear, others shall seem pale with envy for your perfections; and their natural ruddiness shall only serve them to blush, to see their features clouded by your splendor, who will seem like brown bread compared with Manchet,or rather like wooden dishes upon a shelf of China ware,or as another once said, like blubber'd jugs in a cupboard of Venice glasses, or as earthen piss pots in a Goldsmiths shop. By this means your sparkling Glories shall fire Platonick Lovers, so that none though as cold as Saturn, shall be able to resist your actuating flames, but shall force the stoutest heart, to be a Sacrifice to Love. 


by William Salmon, Professor of Physick, 1685. The treatise, "Polygraphice: Or the Arts of Drawing, Engraving, Etching, Limming, Painting ..." will teach you to draw, paint, engrave, sculpt AND prepare cosmetics that will make you astoundingly youthful and beautiful! Never mind that some of the recipes contain mercury and other nefarious ingredients... proceed at your own risk:)

a link to the book: polygraphice